Friday, April 23, 2010

How to tell ADHD and normal behavior apart.

I was recently asked by a parent of an ADHD child, how I weed through Hailey’s behaviors to pinpoint AHDH. That is often a confusing thing for parents to do. Some of the things that ADHD children struggle with may also be a struggle for other children. It is true that gifted children may also act out at school, some children are very hyper, some children talk all of the time, and some children have behavior problems related to poor parenting or stubborn personalities. That is what make the battle for ADHD to be recognized by other parents so hard. It is hard at times to even describe what makes the behaviors so different. I am in no way an expert and I can only give my point of view from observing Hailey. Because there are so many things that ADHD children struggle with I will only address Four of them. These are the ones I here the most backtalk (good and bad) about. I hope this helps someone.

Hyper Activity- Being hyper is not so much a concern for us, as some kids are hyper with or without ADHD. The problem comes from Hailey not being able to stop. She has what I call jumping fits. If we try to get her to slow down she will start to jump. She jumps in one spot. We can sit her down, but her legs are still jumping. So the difference for us in normal hyper activity, and ADHD hyper activity is the ability of the child to gain control and slow down.

Disobediencee- There are days when I would say that Hailey being disobedient is no different than any other child, and other days when I know that it is ADHD. I can tell because I can visually see how hard Hailey is working at being obedient. You can see how frustrated she is with herself when she “messes up”, and she will even show great remorse and try to make it right. That is when I know it’s ADHD. The other times she is just plain old defiant, and you can see it all over her.

Talking- It is a well know fact that girls like to talk. That is normal and perfectly acceptable. However when ADHD comes into play the talking is taken to a whole knew level. What she has to say is more important than anything else. She is often so eager to talk that she will be talking all day even if no one is listening. She will say the same things over and over just to have something to say. She will ask questions just so she can answer them and be talking. On the days I like to call, “Talking Days”, Hailey will give us a play by play of her every move. There are other days that she just has a lot to say like most girls.

Impulse Control- This is such a tricky one and always has been for us. We were unable to tall the difference in how ADHD affected her impulse control when we started medication. I think the best way to describe it is that she has an inability to think before she acts. Even when you try to help her think it through it is very difficult for her. The medication does help, and she can rationally tell you why she should or should not do something. That doesn’t mean that she always makes the right choice while on medication, just like I don’t always make the right choice even though I can rationally think through what I am about to do.

2 comments:

  1. I can totally relate on the hyperactivity point, Luke has the same penchant to jumping. It drives me crazy! One day last year it struck me that he's Tigger. He bounces everywhere, if you hold him, he's still bouncing. That is, when his meds have worn off or first thing in the morning. Effective meds do wonders for his jumping.

    The lack of impulse control is such a hard thing to deal with. Luke would never think about cars when in a parking lot or crossing the road. He never hesitated and certainly never stopped to see if it was safe. I was beating myself up for a couple years for not being able to get through to him on the danger of these locations. This behavior was one of the first ah-ha's I had when he was diagnosed. I actually think it struck me on the way home from the diagnosis meeting, "wow. that makes total sense now. i'm not a deficient mother."

    Your way of illustrating the difference between normal child activity and ADHD is simple, concise and so clear.

    Penny
    http://adhdmomma.blogspot.com

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  2. LOVE THIS! I have a 7yo son with ADHD and in addition to our daily struggles, one of the hardest thing is having to 'convince' someone of the validity of his ADHD.
    I love how you articulated these 4 area's. I would agree on all of them.
    I would also add that my son is 'gifted' as well and so he is well aware of most aspects of his medicine and his ADHD and so it is a extremely fine line that we walk in the explanation of his disorder. I NEVER want him to use it as an excuse for poor behavior.
    I have explained to him that the medicine gives his brain just "ONE EXTRA SECOND" to think before he acts, so when he is not on his medicine i can discretely remind him that he is responsible for the EXTRA SECOND today. He always responds to that.
    thanks for this today!

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